Another Day
by AzureF
Summary: Gaz reflects on why she is so cold to Dib. Oneshot. Unexpected, to say the least.


_Whoo! 'Tis me again, AzureF! With yet ANOTHER one-shot!  
Is it just me, or are these turning into a trend, here…?_

_Well, no matter! This one I've been thinking of doing for a LONG time, ever since I started 'Realization' way back when. Really, **Dibsthe1**, an awesome author and a very persuasive individual, inspired this to come into creation. Otherwise, I might never have thought of it._

_Sorta written in a direct challenge to they're argument about why Gaz hates Dib so much. My speculation is: what is she DOESN'T? What if she's just… well, you'll see it in the fic, no use spoiling it XD_

_VERY philosophical here, so don't read if you aren't prepared to at least go into a bit of thought. Nonetheless, I didn't go into as much detail on most of this as I would've liked to, but that really can't be helped in a one-shot like this. It'd turn into a story… And even though my failed one-shot 'Realization' turned into a pretty damned good dark story of four chapters, I don't really have any idea where I'd go with this._

_But if anyone wants to take a challenge and see what would happen if they wrote a fic with this type of Gaz, I'd like to see it done. XD I'm sure it would be quite a bit different from what we're all used to seeing from the little gamer queen of hell._

_Thanks again, **Dibsthe1**! I hope this little fic makes you think a bit; it certainly does me, and I wrote it! XD_

_Disclaimer: Dib and Gaz are (c) 100 percent to Jhonen Vasquez! I no owney!_

* * *

Another day dawns on the world, another boring, uneventful day for another boring, uneventful year. They go around like insects, scurrying to do what they want before the sun goes down, convinced that something they do might actually change some part of the world, for better or worse. Convinced that the entire universe revolves around them and them alone…

But we know the truth, don't we? Oh, you don't think I do, you think I don't care, that my life revolves around a world made up by cooperate companies trying to make a quick buck by developing escapes from reality. But you don't know the half of the truth; oh, you don't know anything. I watch; I listen. I don't tune out the world at all. Why else do I wish you to be quiet every second of every day? You're the only one that drowns them out, really, but I can't have that all the time. I need to observe them, study them. Not that there's much to study, really, but I guess we get that from our dad. Scientific minds and all….

They're so foolish…. They don't even realize that the universe is so much bigger than them… So naive in thinking that they'll always be safe somehow, that nothing this world or another could ever touch them to harm them…. They ignore the news, let the world waste away, and refuse to see the bad things in life….

Oh, but you know the bad things, don't you? Yes, you know them all too well.

But still you try; still you attempt desperately to convince them of something, anything, which might save them. But like ravenous maggots they devour you, grind you to ashes and laugh at your pain. No one believes you, my cursed sibling, and I doubt anyone ever will.

Yet you try. You want to save them from their destruction. Yes, your focus is a bit off; I doubt that there is any current serious threat that the world might be overtaken by beings from another planet, but you… so blinded by your desperation to help them, to make a difference…. Even if you know they don't care. You refuse, as stubbornly as possible, to see all the bad things they've done to you, you refuse to stop caring.

…Noble… Almost too noble. Your path is turning down a dark road, my sibling… You trod the path of the maytr, always willing to sacrifice yourself. It sickens me that you would be so blind, after all these years. That you could be so blatantly and unswervingly optimistic is nearly frightening.

You search obsessively for the truth, but the only way you live is by lies. They hold you together, though you are falling apart at the seams… I wish I could piece you back together…

You'd ask why I never help you, why I never try to do anything for you? It's not because I don't care, my sibling. No, I care altogether _too much_. Why else would I put up such an apathetic façade, why else would I live each moment of my life with you in an act? I want to care, I want you to know I do, but that would be wrong, _too much so_, to do.

Giving you support would topple an already unstable and delicate structure. All your life you will be ridiculed; hated by most and believed by none but the most secretive of the population. No matter how hard you try, you will never be recognized.

I didn't choose for it to be this way. How could I? I'm merely doing what I have to…

But could it be wrong to do _this_ as well? To sit here, glaring at you with false loathing as I listen to the world as carefully as I can, observing it, seeing it for what it really is yet telling no one of what I've discovered? Perhaps you would not topple with some support; perhaps you might even become sturdier… But no, it would weaken you. Giving you any sort of kindness would weaken you. You need to be strong for the future, for the real tests to save the world. You can never come to expect gratitude or love for your actions, for it will never come, not from them. So I cannot give you something that will unbalance you. You must live this life alone.

My brother, how I wish I could tell you…

I'm making you strong…

* * *

_Um hmmmm… Wow…  
So, thoughts? Be interesting to hear the responses to this one._


End file.
